The man pointed with his brow to the wall behind her, which was so close, yet impossible for her to touch. When she turned, she gasped. The wall shimmered. The portal opened.
This was really fun...and scary, Corey. It was clean ...I was surprised to find an adventure other than what I anticipated. She didn't want to go home...and she sure didn't. But now I want to ask....is this Kenya a real person who disappeared and you created where she went? What a great bedtime story. You are my 141st.
No, fortunately Kenya was not inspired by a real-life missing person. Though I suppose subconsciously I chose to write the article at the end because of the rising incidents of missing women in the US (especially women who are minorities and indigenous) but I did not intentionally set out to make that statement.
Corey, I'm at a loss for words after reading this. There's something about this story that immediately struck a chord. The line in the beginning about Kenya digging tunnels out through books and black holes having their own gravity really resonated, as I grew up in a small town not dissimilar to Trent. And then of course the newspaper clipping at the end really brought it all together and made it real. Thank you for this!
This was stunning, Corey. The metaphors you wove—Trent as a black hole, the In-Between as a liminal portal, forward motion as the only truth—cut deep in the best way. Kenya and Henry’s moment felt both mythic and intimate, like something out of a modern-day Pilgrim’s Progress meets Station Eleven. That final dance? Poetic, tender, unforgettable. Thank you for this reminder that even when the path forward is unclear or unwanted, it’s often the only direction we truly have. I’ll be thinking about that line—“We hope to see each other soon.”—for a long time.
That they’re both going forward in different directions, and have to pass each other like dancers… elegant idea
Thank you! It's an image/constraint I really enjoyed writing.
This was really fun...and scary, Corey. It was clean ...I was surprised to find an adventure other than what I anticipated. She didn't want to go home...and she sure didn't. But now I want to ask....is this Kenya a real person who disappeared and you created where she went? What a great bedtime story. You are my 141st.
Thx for sharing.
I'm so glad you enjoyed it!
No, fortunately Kenya was not inspired by a real-life missing person. Though I suppose subconsciously I chose to write the article at the end because of the rising incidents of missing women in the US (especially women who are minorities and indigenous) but I did not intentionally set out to make that statement.
Really good. Very clean writing. Flow is excellent. Use of metaphor is top notch. But, it's not really a short story. It's Chapter 1 of a novel.
Thank you!
Idk if I have much more to say with this story for a full length work, but it does get me thinking of the possibility.
Corey, I'm at a loss for words after reading this. There's something about this story that immediately struck a chord. The line in the beginning about Kenya digging tunnels out through books and black holes having their own gravity really resonated, as I grew up in a small town not dissimilar to Trent. And then of course the newspaper clipping at the end really brought it all together and made it real. Thank you for this!
Thank you, it blows my mind how deeply this little story is impacting some of my readers.
I really enjoyed adding the newspaper. It's something I might incorporate in future stories.
This was stunning, Corey. The metaphors you wove—Trent as a black hole, the In-Between as a liminal portal, forward motion as the only truth—cut deep in the best way. Kenya and Henry’s moment felt both mythic and intimate, like something out of a modern-day Pilgrim’s Progress meets Station Eleven. That final dance? Poetic, tender, unforgettable. Thank you for this reminder that even when the path forward is unclear or unwanted, it’s often the only direction we truly have. I’ll be thinking about that line—“We hope to see each other soon.”—for a long time.
Thank you for your beautiful words. This truly gave me chills to read.